"So, Apple has replaced wired headphones with wireless. In the long-running game of smartphone maker one-upmanship, our favourite South Korean company announced the upcoming "Samsung Galaxy Blank" - a phone without a screen; makes an excellent paperweight. Meanwhile, Google suggested that its next Nexus might not even have corporeal form - users instead rely on imagination for functionality. Unfortunately, patent trolls claim ownership of both ideas. Stay tuned for more Onion-like news!"
It should be noted that my phone is a Galaxy Note!